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Faith began by reminding them where they left off last time by talking about how she felt like she had turned into another person when she walked down that dark hall to her bedroom. She felt hot, angry, disappointed, confused, and defeated by it all. She opened the window to her bedroom to take in some fresh air. It was a cold night like tonight and then the white hot tears began to flow. She couldn't believe what she heard. She was not interested in that senior boy, what are they talking about. By morning Faith was not going to talk to her parents ever again as long as she lived, but of course, that wouldn't be true either. Upon arrival at school that morning, the typical psychological changes were taking place. She had a renewed interest in this Steve guy, her friends, brother. Her interest was peeked about whether he was a villain or monster, or what? The next months would bring about the exact opposite of what her parents had hoped for. Faith not only struck up a friendship with Steve, but started hanging out more with her new friends. They would lie for her while she and two other couples would go out riding together, even going to near-by towns for the evening. Springtime brought on the final blow with her sneaking out of her bedroom window and running off to her friends house for the night. What she didn't expect was, the perfect betrayal. Classmates and people in the town soon heard of the run away and asked her friend about whether Faith had slept with her in her room or her brothers room. With great gusto and story telling ability, her friend told of how they stayed together in his room. The small town made mincemeat of Faith and her parents. Her dad being a teacher, her mother working for the religious college, Dean of Students sparked her parents picking up everything and moving to Indianapolis.
Faith sat back in her chair and readjusted the covers. She sighed and went on. It was quite the shock for her, her parents, and their readjustment to a much bigger city. The relationship between she and her parents had further deteriorated. As a 10th grader now, she joined a girls click called the 17 checks and did some cheer leading. One of the football players, a senior had now taken notice of her also. Suddenly Faith sat up and said loudly," Oh, and did you know one of the former teachers told me I should find a man and get married, cause my math scores were too bad to ever go to college?" There were agreeing gasps in the room. It is safe to say at 16, she was now depressed and wondering what was next. Her new boyfriend was joining the Air Force in the spring, and talked her into getting married and moving south with him. Unfortunately, she reported, it wasn't hard to be talked into at that time. And, so they ran off and got married in another state. Before he deployed south later that year, she was soon pregnant. Her dad cried and her mother evidently was planning a very elaborate scheme that would change her life forever. After her husband went off to his first base in the south, Faith's mother encouraged her to see a doctor about the pregnancy and make sure things were okay.
The doctor was not a regular doctor and during the exam performed a first stage abortion. Becoming irate and full of the knowledge of what was happening, Faith caused more harm then good. And, to make the story less then horrible, she lost that child, packed her bags and flew to Georgia ahead of schedule. On the airplane Faith tried to think through about what had just happened. Where is God in these kinds of things? How could this happen to anyone, let alone me? What had I done to deserve this? I must be one deranged and horrible daughter, person, woman.
Faith stopped talking for awhile trying to decide where to take this very long and sad story. All those hopes and dreams of being a pianist, tap dancer, writer, actress, were gone. And, so after two years of miscarriages, and her husband being sent to Okinawa, she went back home to finish commercial college, and see what path to take in life. Learning that her husband had taken a geisha girl overseas, she filed for divorced, and started partying with friends. She renewed her interest in the occult things and began searching her future out of horoscopes. She did well at the Commercial College. Her mother thought she should get a finishing school and modeling career going, therefore paying for it.
Sub consciously she knew her new relationship with a Mexican-American family would create more stress with she and her parents. She married the oldest son and another nightmare would unfold.
Having a career in modeling, teaching finishing school, partying, forecasting futures herself; it had now become a lifestyle of emptiness and craziness. Serious alcoholism and gambling had entered into the marriage and before all was lost, she divorced once again. Her wonderful mother in law (who to this day - calls her daughter) insisted she go to counseling - "You need help!"
Faith acknowledged her anger, depression and did just that.
Looking up Faith put the Bunnies down on the floor and said, "And, we've just got to the tip of the ice-berg, gang!" Next time I will have yet another huge journey to tell you about. The one that finally led me to Jesus 40 years ago. Thank you for listening, night, night!
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